


Lost Without You

by ryelined



Category: Red Dead Redemption
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-06
Updated: 2018-12-06
Packaged: 2019-09-12 19:39:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,947
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16877958
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ryelined/pseuds/ryelined
Summary: After the Blackwater mess, you'd returned after being away to find the gang wanted and missing without a trace.  But there's one person that you refuse to lose: Arthur Morgan.  So, you set off to find him.





	Lost Without You

**Author's Note:**

> originally posted as a request on my rdr tumblr: bluemorgans <3

“Tell me where he is, or I swear to _god_ I’ll kill you.”

 

“I-I don’t know anything, I swear!”

 

You tighten your grip on the man’s collar and stare down at him, hatred radiating from every inch of you.He’ll squeal eventually, you know, based on the way he’s shaking beneath you and the satisfying little tears pooling in the corners of his terrified eyes.

 

“Then why did I hear you talking about him?”

 

“Must’ve misunderstood--”

 

“ _Huh_?!” you screech, raising your fist in front of the man’s face.You’re undecided as to whether or not you’ll actually hit him, but his eyes bug out at just the threat of violence and he immediately surrenders.

 

“You’re right!I was talking about the man from Blackwater.B-but listen, he’s not bad, h-he saved my life, and I swore I wouldn’t--”

 

“What the hell are you talking about?”You let go of him, and he crashes to the floor with a dull thud.Your rage diminishes and confusion takes its place.The man cowers under your towering form, but he senses the shift in your demeanor and regains a bit of his composure.

 

“You’re a bounty hunter, aren’t you?”

 

“Sometimes,” you answer honestly, but still glare down at the man.“But not now.What’s it to you?”

 

“Then why are you looking for him?”

 

“That’s none of your business.”

 

“He saved my life.He did.”You eye the man as he shakily stands up, but you allow him to.“B-but he’ll find a way to kill me if I tell you where he is, he said he would, he remembers--”

 

You cut him off with a wave of your hand. 

 

“Was he tall, deep voice, brown leather jacket?”The man gives a sharp nod, and you have to hide a little spark of a smile from showing on your face.It’s Arthur. 

 

“He’s alive?” you whisper, and he nods again, less sure.“Where is he?”

 

“Your his friend, then?”You hear him mumble something about not being surprised, but you decide to ignore it; you have more important things to focus on.

 

“Where is he?” you repeat again, more forcefully this time.It’s already been so long, far too long, since you’ve seen Arthur, and you don’t have the patience to wait any longer.

 

The man still seems reluctant to tell you, and you are starting to lose your temper again.However, a voice in the back of your mind says, if it had been Arthur who threatened him, you can imagine why he doesn’t want to tell you.You stare him down until, finally, he cracks.

 

“H-He was in Valentine a few days ago,” he stutters.“That’s all I know,I swear!”

 

You don’t even bother to thank him as you whistle for your horse and jump on, unable to keep a grin off your face as you take off towards Valentine.Your mind races as the hooves of your horse beat against the dirt roads.You have no idea what you’ll do when you find him.Punch him for leaving without a trace?Kiss him because you missed him so much?Maybe, a combination of the two, even. 

 

You shake your head.The first one you could probably get away with, but the second would be… weird.You think; you’re not sure.You’ve thought about kissing Arthur Morgan too many times to count, but actually doing it is something else entirely. 

 

He’s your friend, a good one, probably your closest one.And, accidentally, he’d become more than a friend. He’s different.Caring, thoughtful, funny, and, obviously, handsome.He treats you like the real, multi-dimensional person you are, and not just a criminal or a girl, like almost everyone else.There’s a mutual, unspoken respect you share with him, one you hold dear.You’d never been able to put words to it, but you’d always thought that despite the two of you thriving in the kind of life you’d chosen, you both wanted something more. 

 

So, after you’d befriended the hot-headed, sarcastic gunslinger, you’d, mostly unintentionally, fallen in love with the perceptive, deep, and kind man he’d revealed to you.You two had spent so much time obviously attracted to each other, openly flirting, staying up for hours talking, and going out of your ways to see each other.But you both live busy lives, and, for some reason, neither of you two had made a move and come out to say how you feel. 

 

And it’s now, as your heart pounds and your horse charges under the glow of the moon, that you realize you might never see him again.Arthur Morgan is that something more you need, and that’s exactly why you cannot lose him.

 

If feels like forever before you reach Valentine, but you finally make it, and doubt starts to build in your chest.Even if he’d been here, you have no idea if you’ll actually find him here.But, you have to keep searching, so you decide the best place to look is obvious: the saloon.

 

You hitch your horse and barge inside, but to your dismay, he’s not there.Every face in the room turns to stare at you as you slam the saloon doors open, and Arthur’s isn’t one of them.In the next second, you’re stomping back out onto the street, refusing to let yourself be disappointed.That’s only one place out of several; you’re _going_ to find him somewhere here.

 

The inn seems like the next best place, so you head across the street.As you’re about to push open the door, however, a hand wraps around your wrist and yanks you backwards.

 

“What the hell?!” you shout as the pull forcefully turns you around to face a stranger.A man, drunk, disheveled, giving you a creepy grin that makes you feel nothing but disgusted.You can smell the alcohol reeking off of him.

 

“Hey, baby,” the man slurs, swaying dangerously on his feet as he leans in towards you.“Goin’ in there without me?”

 

“Yes,” you say darkly.You turn around and try to open the door again, but the man sticks his hand out and forces it to shut.With rage igniting behind your narrowed eyes, you turn and look him in his dumb, drunken face and size him up.He’s a lot bigger than you, but he can hardly walk and you’re furious, so you figure you have a good chance at winning when this inevitably turns into a fight.

 

You open your mouth to curse him out when a new voice interrupts you.

 

“Excuse me,” it says, in a gruff, familiar tone.Your harasser turns his head, and with a painful thud, next thing you know, he’s on the floor, out-cold.

 

“Looked like you needed some help,” says Arthur Morgan, standing in front of you, looking exactly like you remembered him, right down to the smug little half-smile.

 

You stay there, frozen, unprepared for the swell of feelings that hit you.You open and close your mouth, trying to figure out how to convey your gratitude, fury, relief, joy.Instead of using words you simply rush forward and embrace him, and you feel his arms wrap tight around you and it feels like he’d never been gone.

 

“I thought you were dead,” you choke out, muffled by his chest.You feel the vibrations as he lets out a soft laugh.

 

“Though I’d die that easily, did you?” 

 

You pull away and hope he doesn’t notice the tears budding at the edges of your eyes.

 

“I-I had no idea,” you stutter, failing to keep the emotion out of your voice.Worry flashes across his face as he starts to realize what’s happening.“You guys were just _gone_ , a-and I didn’t know if I would find you--”

 

Arthur draws you into his arms again as the tears flow over and fall down your face.“I’m here,” he soothes, and you can hear the guilt lacing his voice.“Let’s go inside.”He takes your hand and you let him guide you inside and up the stairs, ignoring the stares from the innkeeper.

 

In his rented room, he guides you to the edge of the bed and sits down beside you.

 

“You must’ve thought I forgot about you,” he says solemnly, watching helplessly as a tear drips off your chin.

 

“‘Course not.”You wipe your cheek and try to make your voice even.“Arthur, I just…”The words catch in your throat.Now that he’s back, really in front of you, really _here_ , you’re suddenly shy, just like you were before he left.You don’t know why it’s so hard to tell him how you feel, but he makes you feel so _much_ , and it makes more tears fall from your eyes.

 

You start wiping some away, but, delicately, his hand comes up and takes yours, letting the tears flow freely.Vision blurry, you look up at his bright blue eyes gazing softly down at you.

 

“You’re smart,” he states, moving his other hand to cradle your face, wiping his thumb across your cheek.“I knew you’d figure it out.But,” he sighs, and his eyebrows draw together as if he’s in pain, “I’m so sorry.I should’ve done more.”

 

You give him a teary smile and shake your head.“They’d’ve shot you if you stepped foot in that town.”

 

“I know,” he laughs.“Don’t thinks that’s a good enough excuse though.”You chime in with your own laugh, and in that nice moment of relief, Arthur sweeps you up and puts you on his lap.Heat spreads across your face as you wrap your arms around his neck, but it feels so _natural_ to be close to him like this.

 

“I thought about you,” he starts, and his voice is barely above a whisper, but you can hear him perfectly.“I thought about you all the time.Made me realize some things.”

 

“Like what, Mr. Morgan?”You can feel the tears drying on your cheeks, but now the sadness that accompanied them has vanished, and coy, heart-thumping excitement takes its place.

 

“I’ve been a fool,” he says, and then he takes your face in his hands and pushes your hair behind your ears.“I’ve been too distracted, I took you for granted, and I’ve wasted too much time not wanting to face the way I feel about you.”

 

“Oh,” is all you can manage to say.Your heart is beating out of your chest, and your mind is too busy focusing on the sound of his voice, the shape of his lips, and the feel of his hands on your face to come up with words.

 

“I’m sorry it had to come to this for me to do something.”He looks away once, a hint of hesitation creeping into his eyes, but you’ve been waiting far too long, and you pull him towards you and crash your lips into his.

 

His stubble burns against your face and his lips are chapped, but they’re warm and kind.There’s a faint taste of cigarettes and whiskey on him, and it makes you feel like you’re home.You’ve daydreamed about this moment hundreds of times before, and maybe it’s not exactly how you thought it would happen, but it’s so much better in reality than any dream could have been.

 

The two of you pull away, breathless, with matching soft, shy smiles.

 

“Why’d we waste so much time?” you sigh as he brushes the last of your tears away.

 

“Didn’t think we’d run out, I guess.”

 

“That was dumb of us.”

 

Arthur chuckles and gives you a look that warms every corner of your heart.“What a pair we’re going to be.”

**Author's Note:**

> hope you enjoyed and want this cowboy to be happy as much as i do <33 thanks for reading!


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